Saturday, June 13, 2009

A great version of the Bible

I stumbled, almost literally, over a version of the Bible that you should look at.

It's the LOLCat Bible. (Srsly, d00dz!) To give you an idea, here's Genesis 1:
Boreded Ceiling Cat makinkgz Urf n stuffs
1 Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem.
2 Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz.
3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.5 An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1
6 An Ceiling Cat sayed, im in ur waterz makin a ceiling. But he no yet make a ur. An he maded a hole in teh Ceiling.7 An Ceiling Cat doed teh skiez with waterz down An waterz up. It happen.8 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has teh firmmint wich iz funny bibel naim 4 ceiling, so wuz teh twoth day.
9 An Ceiling Cat gotted all teh waterz in ur base, An Ceiling Cat hadz dry placez cuz kittehs DO NOT WANT get wet.10 An Ceiling Cat called no waterz urth and waters oshun. Iz good.
11 An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. An a Corm. It happen.12 An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weedz.13 An so teh threeth day jazzhands.
14 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has lightz in the skiez for splittin day An no day.15 It happen, lights everwear, like christmass, srsly.16 An Ceiling Cat doeth two grate lightz, teh most big for day, teh other for no day.17 An Ceiling Cat screw tehm on skiez, with big nails An stuff, to lite teh Urfs.18 An tehy rulez day An night. Ceiling Cat sawed. Iz good.19 An so teh furth day w00t.
20 An Ceiling Cat sayed, waterz bring me phishes, An burds, so kittehs can eat dem. But Ceiling Cat no eated dem.21 An Ceiling Cat maed big fishies An see monstrs, which wuz like big cows, except they no mood, An other stuffs dat mooves, An Ceiling Cat sawed iz good.22 An Ceiling Cat sed O hai, make bebehs kthx. An dont worry i wont watch u secksy, i not that kynd uf kitteh.23 An so teh...fith day. Ceiling Cat taek a wile 2 cawnt.
24 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has MOAR living stuff, mooes, An creepie tings, An otehr aminals. It happen so tehre.25 An Ceiling Cat doed moar living stuff, mooes, An creepies, An otehr animuls, An did not eated tehm.
26 An Ceiling Cat sayed, letz us do peeps like uz, becuz we ish teh qte, An let min p0wnz0r becuz tehy has can openers.
27 So Ceiling Cat createded teh peeps taht waz like him, can has can openers he maed tehm, min An womin wuz maeded, but he did not eated tehm.
28 An Ceiling Cat sed them O hai maek bebehs kthx, An p0wn teh waterz, no waterz An teh firmmint, An evry stufs.
29 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it.30 For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good.
31 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, teh good enouf for releaze as version 0.8a. kthxbai.

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Thursday, June 04, 2009

Betty Bowers Explains Traditional Marriage to Everyone Else

relgI got a lovely link this morning to a great video: Betty Bowers Explains Traditional Marriage to Everyone Else.

Betty Bowers ("America's Best Christian") does a really good deep parody, along the lines of the Ladies Against Women folks, but much better dressed and coiffed.

Very funny stuff!
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Computer, she be dead

I am really upset.

I was shutting my #1 computer down (along with my work computer) for a lightning storm Tuesday evening. In the process, the main hard disk took a spike. The computer's at the repairman's right now, but we don't know how much we can recover.

I have backups that are reasonably current but aren't completely up to date. For example, my email's not current later than about 5/15/09 and there are files, letters, misc stuff that are all in varying stages of currency. I'm very upset.

With luck, we'll be able to get the files off the hard disk before it goes completely dead. But I won't know until Monday or Tuesday.

Well, it could all be worse: it could've been my work computer. I've got that safe and backed up.

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Monday, June 01, 2009

Jeff Swanson and Me

My best friend from high school, Jeff Swanson, lives in Princeton right now, about an hour from Philly. When we were there for Sarah's graduation, he was able to drive in. He's a great guy and I'm very, very happy to have him in my life after all these years.


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Friday, May 29, 2009

Guy Haas has no class! :) :) :)

And if you doubt it, look at this (found here):



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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Gay marriage opposition is much the same as interracial marriage opposition

Here's a truly stunning article on the similarities in the opposition to gay marriage today and the opposition to interracial marriage in past decades. I'd rather thought the arguments had the same shopsoiled feeling to them; it looks like I was right.
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Monday, May 25, 2009

Back from Philly, back at work

I'm catching up on Things and posting a blog entry seemed relevant. The Babe and I were off in Philly last week to see her oldest daughter getting her Ph.D. in Classics. Lars and Doug (Sarah's father) were there, too, and Narda's parents Behnaz and Herb drove in from DC. I got lots of pictures of everybody, but here's perhaps the best: it's Sarah standing in front of one of the statues of Ben Franklin on the U.Penn campus.



Sarah's got a teaching contract at Georgetown, which is even more prestigious. I am so incredibly proud to have her as a stepdaughter.

Travel is fun and it was wonderful to see Sarah's most recent moment of glory, but GHOD I am glad to be back home and back at work. There's a lot of exciting stuff going on on my project and I'm glad to be banging the keys again.

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"Is 'Gay' a Choice?"

This is a nice little cartoon that I'd love for many of the people I used to work with in Indiana to have to watch for a couple weeks non-stop, particularly the same jerk who said that he felt that Abu Ghraib was basically not a problem because he approved of torture as long as he didn't have to know about it. (Oh, well, gee, Dave O., I'm sure that makes it all okay....)

I do like the swipe they take at Bob Jones University at the end, too.


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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Ok, folks, its quiz time

My high-school friend Tom Ciborowski, an amazingly good P.E. who's in the Middle East these days building an artificial island, sent this to a bunch of us:

Today's quiz is on areas:

1. How many Nooks are there in a Bunder?
2. How many Dhurs are there in a Tsubo?
3. How many Carreaus are there in a Rood (not Rod)?
4. How many Cawneys are there in a Stang?

(Yes, there are answers to this. You can get the hard math at www.convertunits.com, but the explanation of what these are is to be found elsewhere.)

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Twitter meets Reality TV....

....or some such conjunction. There's a website that Susan the Wonderchild pointed out to me this morning called FMyLife.com (motto: "My life sucks, but I don't give a f***"). It's kinda like bits of Twitterage about doom, gloom, and boom.

The format is you post a short comment about something you've done or that's happened to you, followed by the initials "FML." As I read these, I keep thinking of Bill Engvall's "Heeeeeere's your sign!" Here are a few examples:
  • Today, I gave my 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML
  • Today, I learned that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. I got it from playing too much World of Warcraft. I got a disease in real life by living in a virtual world. FML
  • Today, I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. Under anesthesia I proceeded to tell the dentist my entire sexual and drug history in detail. FML
  • Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML
It's really rather depressing and frequently sad, but there's at least a measure of schadenfreude that this isn't you, at least.

And it's 8:02, so I need to clock in to work! Y'all have a great day. Or better than these people, anyway.
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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Kamikaze Cooking: The Perfect Steak

This is amazing. The opening bit before the real segment ("Cooking Is Easy If You're Rich and Famous") is perfect.


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Monday, May 11, 2009

"Hedtke's Law" and proper attribution

I was off at the STC conference in Atlanta this past week. It was a lovely event and the photos I took can be found at my Flickr website. Two of my all-time favorite people got their Associate Fellow credentials and I got to see any number of other old friends as well.

At the Board meeting on Friday, no less than 4 people pointed out to me that "Hedtke's Law" (identified as such) had become part of Board canon. Hedtke's Law is something I kept saying while I was on the Board when dealing with people who are too 'nice' (the nose should wrinkle when you say it). 'Nice' is ineffectual, unable to do anything, because you're worried that someone, somewhere will be offended. You may be able to put a name and a face to that somebody, but the idea that SOMEBODY will be upset would completely prevent the STC from doing a lot of things in the past that should've been done to the betterment of the members or the Society as a whole. (And fuck that noise, btw.)

I have no patience for people who don't want to get anything done because they're in mortal fear of offending someone, when, in fact, they're there to get something done. When confronted with this ineffectual thinking--of which we had an awful lot at the time--I kept saying this:

"If it doesn't offend somebody, it couldn't possibly interest anybody."

I said it so often that this was dubbed "Hedtke's Law," and it's a very flattering legacy for getting the STC turned in the right direction. (There's a corollary to this, too: If you're the one offended, it's just your bad luck that this time it was you.)

But I really need to set the record straight on one point: I didn't write this. My old friend, Allyn Wolfe, was responsible for saying this some 35 years ago in the pages of Red Garters, a Craft magazine that he edited. (His editorial policy was, similarly, "I shall continue to provoke everyone within my reach!") It's a profoundly great statement and, although I'm getting the credit for saying it, I want it stated for the record that it was Allyn who came up with this in the first place.


For more on Hedtke's Laws, click here.
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