Thursday, December 02, 2010

We now know when Jesus is coming--May 21, 2011

The world is coming to an end on May 21, 2011. Well, at least for Christians; that's when Jesus is coming according to this guy. He's not being casual about it, either; there are 40 billboards in Nashville announcing this already, which is rather impressive. He is committed to this date.

Well, I'll have our taxes filed months before that, so I guess that's all to the good.

I really people who're so specific about the end of the world. As long as they're not describing an asteroid strike or something factual, they're whackjobs, but it's kinda in the "C'mon, lads, we must get a winner one day" spirit.
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Wednesday, December 01, 2010

Jokes du jour

Jokes du jour:

Susan the Wonderchild hit me with this one last night:
Q. Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?"
A. To get to the same side.

When I told this to Ginny Morey, she replied with:
Q. How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. It's a really obscure number; you've probably never heard of it.
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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Twilight -- a physical analysis

This is from I Love Charts. It's a delightful analysis of Twilight.


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Sunday, November 28, 2010

"Merry Christmas, bitch!"

It's almost December and time to slog through the Christmas season once again. But this is a funny video clip in really bad taste that I think you'll enjoy.


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Saturday, November 27, 2010

Dealing with leftovers: cheesy potato casserole bread

The Babe found a lovely recipe for dealing with excess mashed potatoes. I realize as I write this that this is a hard concept to fathom, the idea of too many mashed potatoes, even as leftovers, but I suppose that it is theoretically possible.

Given the premise that one might conceivably want to devote leftover mashed potatoes to something other than a vehicle for gravy and butter, the Babe found a lovely recipe for Cheesy Potato Casserole Bread, which uses leftover mashed potatoes that have, for some reason, been dubbed as "excess" potatoes.

I'm going to reproduce the recipe here for convenience, but all credit goes to Anna P, who posted the recipe on food.com. She says she got it from a flyer, so who knows who did this originally?

Cheesy Potato Casserole Bread
By Anna P. on May 20, 2003

Prep Time: 1 hr
Total Time: 1 3/4 hrs
Serves: 6
Yield: 1 Loaf

Ingredients
1 (1/4 ounce) envelope active dry yeast
1 cup warm milk
1/3 cup vegetable shortening, at room temperature
1 large egg
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup mashed potatoes, at room temperature
1/2 cup shredded extra-sharp cheddar cheese
1/2 cup freshly grated parmesan cheese

Directions
  1. Grease a deep round or oval 2-quart casserole and set aside.
  2. In a large mixing bowl, sprinkle the yeast over the milk and let dissolve.
  3. Add the shortening, egg, salt, pepper, and 1 cup of the flour and beat till smooth, about 2 minutes Stir in the remaining 2 cups flour, the potatoes, and cheddar till well blended, scrape the dough in the prepared casserole, cover with plastic wrap, and let rise in a warm area till doubled in bulk, about 40 minutes.
  4. Preheat the oven to 375°F.
  5. Sprinkle the Parmesan evenly, over the top of the dough and bake till golden brown, about 45 minutes.
  6. Transfer the bread to a wire rack to cool, then cut into slices.

Things worth noting

You'll put the initial ingredients in the bowl as directed, blend it vigorously with a beater, then add the rest of the ingredients and most of the flour save the last cup and beat that, then add the last cup and use a stiff spoon or large fork to mix everything... but you don't knead it! It's all mixed in the bowl and then you pour it right into the greased 2qt cooking dish, cover with saran wrap, and let it rise right there. When it's risen, you don't punch it down, but just slip it into the oven. The eggs provide the glue that you'd normally create by kneading and building up the gluten. So it's a cross between a quick bread and a yeast bread, but it doesn't leave that slight baking soda flavor in the back of the mouth. And it's very tasty!
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Thursday, November 25, 2010

A Thanksgiving blessing

This was copied from Herb Mitchell, who lifted it from a greeting card.

May your stuffing be tasty,
May your turkey be plump.
May your potatoes 'n gravy have nary a lump.

May your yams be delicious
May your pies take the prize,
May your Thanksgiving dinner stay off of your thighs!!

Dinner's in 45 minutes here.
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Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Hedtke's Law #9

Here's another of Hedtke's Laws:
Hedtke's Law Number 9: Life is so much easier when you have no shame.
For more on Hedtke's Laws, click here.
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News story today

Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling, bouncing up and down, and prevents the nipples from showing through the fabric when cold.

At a news conference, after announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.
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Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Marijuana will ruin your life

An exceptional video that shows you how marijuana will ruin, absolutely ruin, your life.


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Monday, November 22, 2010

Quote du jour

More TSA fun:
Many families will celebrate Thanksgiving TSA style. To get to the dinner table, you either go through the kitchen past the microwave or go through the den and have a brief chat with creepy Uncle Ted. --Bill Swallow

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Friday, November 19, 2010

Joke du jour

This one's really inappropriate and tasteless. So of course I like it!

-------------------------------------

It's WW II.

Karol Wojtyla is running through woods in Poland, being chased by a Nazi soldier. Capture's imminent, so he prays while running, "Oh, Lord, please save me!"

Suddenly, the clouds opened and a voice boomed out to both of them: "Do not harm this man! He will one day be Pope and be revered by billions!!"

Karol Wojtyla dropped to his knees, clasped his hands, and said "Thank you, Lord!"

The Nazi soldier looks up at the sky and says, "OK, Lord, but what's in it for me?"

The voice boomed back "One day, you'll be Pope, too!"
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Thursday, November 18, 2010

Quote du jour

"Life is safest lived in the cage of habit." --Luke McGuff
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