Jack Chick tract for Cthulhu

Jack Chick is a bizarre comic book artist who has a particularly fundamentalist view of Christianity, notably that the KJV bible is the best/most inspired/only acceptable translation. He's anti-Catholic, anti-Jew, anti-liberal, anti-pagan, anti-homosexual, anti-occult, anti-Communist, and to a fair extent, anti-education (because that makes you question and is run by liberals at colleges and you don't need it).

Most of us know Jack Chick tracts even if we don't know the name. They're fairly toxic, badly printed, and heavy-handed. This is a Jack Chick-style tract for the gods of the Necronomicon. :)

"Pardon me, boys, is that the lair of great Cthulhu?
The city of slime
Where it's night all the time...."

Jack Chick tract for Cthulhu

Michael Jackson jokes are happening....

They're popping up....

Due to the fact that Michael Jackson was 99% plastic when he died, he's being melted down into Lego blocks so children can play with him for a change.

Michael Jackson jokes are happening....

REEEEEEEALLY tasteless joke!

This is so totally tasteless... but y'gotta admit that this is comedy gold we're mining here!

Right!

So, Farrah Fawcett dies. She gets up to the Pearly Gates and there's a huge crowd there to welcome her. St. Peter says "Head right in!"

A crowd of angels escorts her in and takes her right to the Celestial Throne.

God stands up, comes down and hugs her, and says "My child, you were a wonderful entertainer. I'm sorry you had a painful end, but all your suffering is now behind you. You may have anything you wish."

Farrah says "Anything?"

God says "Anything. What would you like as your heavenly reward?"

Farrah thinks a moment and says "I want all the children in the world to be safe."

And God says "Fine!" and killed Michael Jackson.

REEEEEEEALLY tasteless joke!

Quote du jour

"Ever notice that 'What the hell' is always the right decision?" -Marilyn Monroe

Quote du jour

Homeland Security, by any other name...

...would be just as bad. The original Department of Homeland Security was something from Germany in the 30s and early 40s, with the “Abteilung der Heimat-Sicherheit” ("Department of Homeland Security"). What I hadn't stopped to consider was that the Soviet "Komitet Gosudarstvennoy Bezopasnosti” (better known as the KGB) translates as "Committee for State Security." There's a lovely short piece about this obsession with "security" here.

Homeland Security, by any other name...

Add this clause to your next contract

C. Responsibilities of Consultant

Consultant shall observe and abide by all laws, rules, and regulations of the federal, state, city, and municipal governments (and subdivisions or agencies thereof) as they apply to the work described herein and shall assume all liability for loss by reason of neglect, error, mistake, omission, or violation of such laws, rules, and regulations.

Consultant agrees to marry the daughter/son (as appropriate) of the poorest member of the Engineer’s clan and to kill all enemies opposing the proposed project. Choice of weapons and means of burial are determined by the Owner in accordance to Section 25-A. This Agreement to indemnify and save harmless the Owner and the Engineers shall extend to include all expenses incidental to subsequent investigation, defense, and settlement of such claims (including claims to Workmen’s Compensation) of any person or corporation, including claims of the Owner, Engineer’s clan, or the agents or employees of each of them. Trophies taken from the bodies of the dead found at the site of the project or taken in field studies will remain property of the Owner.

Add this clause to your next contract

Very good choral piece

"I Bless the Rains Down in Africa" done by Perpetuum Jazzile, a Slovenian jazz choir, who do a very nice simulation of a rainstorm using their hands before they start singing.

Very good choral piece

Spiders on drugs, spiders on drugs

We've all heard about spiders being given minute quantities of this and that and then being observed to see what kinds of webs they build. This is a truly funny video about woodspiders on drugs. It's less than 2 minutes long and I promise you'll love it. Watch the whole thing.

Spiders on drugs, spiders on drugs

Thought on gun control

One of the most popular reasons given by gun owners on why it's important for a free America to keep their guns is for the protection and preservation of their rights: no-one, supposedly, will infringe or take away their Constitutional rights as long as they've got guns.

I guess there were no gun owners in the US for the 8 years of the Bush Administration.

Thought on gun control

Yeah, like this one's rocket surgery....

Fla. city to workers: Wear underwear, deodorant

BROOKSVILLE, Fla. – A Florida city is cleaning up with a new dress code that requires city workers to wear underwear and use deodorant. The city council in Brooksville north of Tampa recently approved a dress code that instructs employees to observe "strict personal hygiene."

Rest of the story here.

Yeah, like this one's rocket surgery....

Want a great job in Seattle?

An old and dear friend of mine just sent me a job listing for an Interactive Designer job in Seattle at a great company (Fitch; they do advertising and marketing work) with an incredible team, really fun products, nice offices, a great location (downtown Seattle), and probably a pretty decent salary. I don't know that last one for sure, but I'm willing to make a wager that it's true.

So, if you know someone who’s got interactive designer credentials, likes the look of the job description, and wants to work FT in Seattle, aim them at me and I’ll give them the name of the person to talk to there. You’re more than welcome to pass this around to anyone you like. Have them email me here.

Want a great job in Seattle?

"Alcohol: the cause of... and the solution to... all of life's problems!"

A lovely French video (don't worry, you won't need to understand what they're saying) about animals in Africa enjoying an annual treat of fermented fruits.

"Alcohol: the cause of... and the solution to... all of life's problems!"